2005- Keiji's Dead Rising Risk Lost Planet Risk

December 10, 2005- Lost Planet announced.

June 21, 2005- Mega Man Battle Network 5 is released for all

January 2006- Mega Man ZX announced.

March 3, 2006- Mega Man Maverick Hunter X releases for all!

March 24, 2006- Mega Man Powered Up releases for all!

April 13, 2006- Mega Man Battle Network 5: Double Team DS is released.

June 16, 2006- Mega Man Battle Network 6 is released on GBA instead of DS, but Mega Man Battle Network 5 was released

August 2, 2006- Street Fighter II' Turbo - Hyper Fighting released for Xbox 360

August 6, 2006- Platinum Games is founded

September 28, 2006- Dead Rising is released.

October 2006- Clover Studio gets planned to be backhanded to death after Hideki Kamiya (creator of DMC) and Shinji Mikami (creator of Resident Evil) quit due to being restricted to only sequels.

October 16, 2006- EA charges for cheat codes

March 2007- Clover Studios gets axed.

April 12, 2007- Mega Man Battle Network 5 Team ProtoMan and Colonel is released in Australia....even though Double Team DS was released a year ago. wtf

June 29, 2007- Lost Planet: Extreme Conditions is released for all consoles! Except PS3. lol

July 22, 2007- Mega Man ZX is released for all! (a year later for Europe and Australia)

November 30, 2007- Everyone now has Mega Man Star Force.

October 23, 2007- Mega Man ZX Advent releases on my birthday (in America too)

November 30, 2007- Mega Man Star Force is FINALLY released for all (almost a year after the Japan release; EUR and AUS behind)

March 5, 2008- Mega Man ZX Advent releases for all! (in Europe and Australia, god they keep getting boned)

July 15, 2008- Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop

July 2008- Mega Man 9 announced.

October 1, 2008- Mega Man 9 released. (lol we got it first jelly japan?)

October 31, 2008- Mega Man Star Force 2 released for all (usual Europe and Australia behind scenario)

February 27, 2009- Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop is announced.

June 30, 2009- Mega Man Star Force 3 is released; not for European scrubs.

December 9, 2009- Mega Man 10 announced

2010- Maverick Hunter Canned

March 31, 2010- Mega Man 10 released for all.

June 2010- Rockman Online announced.

July 16, 2010- Mega Man Universe announced.

September 2010- DmC announced

September 29, 2010- Mega Man Legends 3 announced.

October 19, 2010- Vanquish ggs.

October 31, 2010- Keiji leaves Capcom

November 1, 2010- Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City Rumors: Slant Six Slanders

December 6, 2010- Mega Man Archie Announced

February 15, 2011- Marvel vs. Capcom 3 Release

February 22, 2011-

March 31, 2011- Cancelling Mega Man Universe

April 18, 2011- Sonic Generations announced


June 27, 2011- Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D (one save lolol)

July 1, 2011- Mega Man: The Puzzle Battle is released, japan exclusive.

July 18, 2011- Capcom of Europe Cancels Mega Man Legends 3 (Blaming the Fans For It; Denying Keiji's requests)

July 20, 2011- Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 DLC Annoucement

August 5, 2011- Capcom plans an charging for demos.

September 1, 2011- Mega Man's Pixel Logic released Japan exclusive

November 1, 2011- Resident Evil Revelations! For 10 bucks more LOLOL!

November 8, 2011- Capcom attempts charging money for cheats (Dead Rising 2: Off the Record)

November 13, 2011- Mega Man X for UMvC3!...AS A COSTUME

November 15, 2011- Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 Release (8 Stages; 12 Characters; Spectator Mode, comes with the game! free DLC in the UMvC3 release, could've been done in a patch; Balancing Fixes That Could Be Done Via Patches; Crap in comparison to SSFIV; MK got it right; Lied about patching it)

December 30, 2011- Capcom supports SOPA.

January 2012- Mega Man Solitaire jap exclusive

January 26, 2012- Bad Box Art Mega Man confirmed.

February 29, 2012- Mega Man Poker released...JAPAN EXCLUSIVE

March 9. 2012- Street Fighter X Tekken B.S (We're paying for the characters. TWICE.; SFxT PS3 ONLY gets Local Tag-Team online; MK helps pwn Capcom's lies; Capcom shoots people in the face gag)

March 22, 2012- Capcom says survival horror doesn't sell; Resi 6 is gonna be actiony like CoD

April 10, 2012- Lost Planet 3 (Spark Unlimited; Laziness)

April 18, 2012- Special Edition Resi 6! With a $1000+ Jacket. And day one exclusive DLC to different pre-orders.

May 7, 2012- 1 Billion Dollars Lost (RESIORC (Y); MHT (Y); SFxT (N); Capcom Got Thumbs Downed on Better Business Bureau)

May 15, 2012- Capcom is done with DLC-- ok b.s

June 16, 2012- Seth Killian quits Capcom cause it sucks too much D.

2012- Seow approaches Capcom to help him make SF X MM. Being lazy and slowly losing money, Capcom throws cash at him to finish it and shut the fans up

July 3, 2012- Minna to Akashic Heroes

August 15, 2012- Rockman Xover Announcement (Flash Game; iOS; Anniversary Game)

September 28, 2012- "We /might/ remake Resident Evil 2!"

October 2, 2012- Resident Evil 6! Oopsie, mixed reviews! (Resi got that cheat sheet, thrown away for GoW)

October 8, 2012- Resi 6 has on disc DLC.

November 14, 2012- Don't Worry! Mega Will Return!

November 12, 2012- DmC DLC announced

November 29, 2012- Rockman Xover Release (on rails)

December 17, 2012- Street Fighter X Mega Man released.

January 9, 2013- DmC is exactly what the Devil May Cry series needed.

January 15, 2013- DmC got released as the worst selling Devil May Cry game.

March 2013- Rockman Online is cancelled

March 22, 2013- New Mega Man game...DENIED (LOL WE CANCELLED AN ANNOUNCEMENT DURING THE PANEL) We've talked about Mega. Not till he's ready, SORRY!

April 9, 2013- Maverick Hunter released to public.

July 22, 2013- Darkstalkers is over! (for now....)

August 1, 2013- Breath of Fire 6 B.S (turned great franchise into mobile casl faggty-0/194 gg;)

August 16, 2013- Ultra Street Fighter IV not coming to Wii U.

August 30, 2013- Lost Planet 3 is released to mediocre scores across the board. How unexpected.

August 31, 2013- Mighty No. 9 annouced.

September 9, 2013- Capcom has 152 million left

September 24, 2013- Mega Man Board Game Confirmed!!

October 1, 2013- Mighty No. 9 kickstarter end. $3,845,170/$900,000. gg capcom. gg.

October 3, 2013- Capcom Europe laysoff over 50% of it's

October 10, 2013- Capcom can't afford a port. Of a fighting game. They've already made. Thrice.

October 25, 2013- Capcom has slashed prices on the trinity of Resident Evil games for Nintendo platforms, sacrificing the terror-inducing adventures for half off in celebration of Halloween WE'RE GOING BANKRUPT BUY OUR SHIT PLEASE.

November 13, 2013- Mega Man X confirmed

November 19, 2013- Street Fighter X...All Capcom? BUT THEY ARE ALL CAPCOM

November 22, 2013- The final hope: Rise of the dead?

March 17, 2014- The final USF4 character is revealed!! be a cammie clone.

April 1, 2014- Mega Man X redesign!!!!!!...loljkaprilfoolz.  ( )

franchises go to hell in a hand basket

Lock First, Patch Easier

50th Anniversary

Start, But Don't Finish

Chapter 1: Sequels Only FoolsEdit

January 2005

Keiji: Please guys. We've been working very hard on these prototypes. You must accept them!

Capcom of Japan (CoJ): no.

Keiji: But--

CoJ: We didn't ASK for Lost Planet and Dead Rising, k Keiji? We asked for sequels, you can make those new intellectual properties on your own time. Now GO work on Street Fighter, or Resident Evil or something!

Keiji: ...didn't you say you didn't want anymore new street fighter games

CoJ: Whatevs. Look, if we promise you 20% of our budget for a new I.P later this year will you go help the others on the sequels!

Keiji: Yes sir! (walks out with hope)

Little did he know Capcom was going to mercilessly spiral to hell faster over the simplest of tasks

Teacher: Say Mega Man Capcom!


Teacher: ... (prepares to strike Capcom's mouth with a ruler)

March 2005

Keiji: (walks into the board room)

CoJ: Hey Keiji. What's up my main man?

Keiji: Not much. Can I ask you a favor?

CoJ: Anything you want Inafking!

Keiji: Can we please get the budget to start development on Lost Pl--

CoJ: wow can u not we said no like a month ago get out

Keiji: Actually it was TWO months ago.

CoJ: dyk

Keiji: Did I know?

CoJ: we don't care now go tell yoshinori we don't want street fighter 4

Keiji: ...Yes sir.... (leaves board room)

CoJ: LOL TRYING TO INTRODUCE NEW FRANCHISES. What a joke. Besides, his reimagining of Mega Man is much better! Everyone's getting a PSP! It's guranteed success!

May 2005

Jun Takeuchi: Good Luck Keiji!

Shin Kurosawa: Yes. I really hope we're able to get it approved this time. It truly would be foolish for them to reject it after we put so much work into it.

Keiji: Don't worry I got it!

(Keiji walks into the board room and shows CoJ the prototypes for Dead Rising and Lost Planet)

CoJ: ...

Keiji: What do you think?

CoJ: What the hell was that?

Keiji: Dead Rising and Lost--

CoJ Member 1 (CoJM1): Not enough Resident Evil.

CoJ Member 2 (CoJM2): agreed

CoJ Member 3 (CoJM3): DO TELL!

CoJ: yeah denied we'll continue development on these two...things, after the TRUE Capcom games are released. kthxgetoutnow

Keiji: (leaves the board room)

Shin: How did it go?

Keiji: ...we were denied to continue development.

The Entire Team: (sighs)


Keiji: Hey wanna continue developing the game guys?

Shin: Damn straight.

June 2005

Keiji: (walks into the board room) Hey we've been working on Lost--

CoJ: (Scrooge McDucking their cash in a secret vault behind the TV's wall) OMG KEIJI DID YOU EVER LEARN TO KNOCK

Keiji: Sorry sir, I just wanted to show you Los--

CoJ: no get out resi 5 all day son

Keiji: (walks out of the board room)

Jun: Ho-how did it go...

Keiji: (looks down) It went... (holds his head up) GREAT! So great that they raised the budget times FOUR!


Kenji: i knew we shouldn't have told him

November 2005

Keiji: Hey guys!


CoJM1: never speak in ebonics. ever. again.

CoJM2: The engrish doesn't help either.

Keiji: We were speaking engrish? Too bad the viewer wouldn't know due to this unspecified writing

gg bluray


CoJ: Let's face it, the engrish would get old fast.

Keiji: Good point. Anyway I have something to tell you


Keiji: (srs bidness face) I have gone 400% our budget for Dead Rising and Lost Planet. You have but one way to get all that money back and that's to release these games we put our soul into.

CoJM2: no


CoJ: (fell asleep while Keiji talking) WASTE MONEY? HELL NAAAAW (presses a button and CoJM2's seat boosts up through the ceiling and goes to space)

(After that happens a robot resembling CoJM2 emerges from a floor tile and sits in his seat)

CoJM3: oh

CoJ: Eh, I wanted to lay him off anyway. He wanted to make another Power Stone lol hoser. You win this round Inafune. But if these games fail expect the same fate as...what was his name.

(universal shrugs of confusion and uncertainty)

CoJ: Whatevs. Just make sure this game sells or die. Choice is yours

CoJM1: (whispers suductively) choose death

Keiji: ...can we kill him too

CoJ: kk inafune bby (presses a button and CoJM1's tackles him into a corner and boosts upwards, taking him to space)

Keiji: Do you have one prepared for everyone?

CoJ: Of course! We have money like that. Now go warn your team of their potential fate.

Keiji: (gulps and thinks to himself as he walks out of the room) All I can hope.

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